The Meaning of Honesty

I remember being a child. And as a child, I most distinctly remember the urgency and the fervent hope with which my unfortunate parents and teachers tried to drill honesty into my head. I listened, and I was honest - for reasons stretching from not wanting to hurt the aforementioned parents, as well as not being ass-raped by whatever was out there watching me - another topic of some interest for my role models at the time.

Given all of this, it was a pleasant surprise to realize, in my early adolescence (the 'tweens', I believe they're called) that untruths could serve the awesome purpose of preventing Earthly vengeance - and that divine intervention hadn't been happening for a while. Self righteous anger at those who used falsehoods regularly had their impact on this volte-face. I would often find myself angry at liars, and console myself with the idea that it'd return to bite their ass. When it didn't, my disgust steadily turned to fascination.

Once I'd adopted the way of the lie, life was good. It just made things easier. I mean, so much so, that I'd often find it unnecessary to do anything at all. Of course, when these sort of things piled up, I'd often find myself in deeper shit than I would have been if I hadn't lied. But as I grew up, I found a balance - I lied about some things, and didn't about some. And I carried on.

However, at some point, when the balance became difficult to maintain (mostly because of women entering into my life, and how little I found it safe to tell my parents about them), I realized that just telling the truth was the best thing. I also realized that without thinking about it, I'd held myself to being honest about those things that I'd write or do inside or outside the classroom. This does not include homework and assignments, which I unabashedly did every morning in the 15 minutes it took for class to start, because those assignments were moronic to begin with.

I've always loved doing projects. They made me go and read things on my own, beyond the scope of the (inevitable) shit that I was taught within it. I learned more of the world in those hours spent before encyclopedias (before the internet) and Grolier (does anyone remember what this was? At all? It used to be excellent) and Encarta on the computer.

When I got into Law School, and I was told that there were 4 projects to do a trimester, I was ecstatic. Then I realized how tedious they were. The concept of footnoting everything seemed rather wasteful. But as I continued reading for these things, I did eventually fall in love with this avatar of the same thing. I delighted in realizing new things, and finding them and making them my own. I was scrupulously honest about these things - worked entirely on my own, no cogging/faffing, and all original research and work.

So, this is where this post tells you how to do it wrong. This blog's been kind of straying from it's original path, so I hope to do it the way it was meant to be.

1. Don't go to your crazy ass bitch psycho Human Rights teacher, and ask for a new project topic because you want to do it on a topic you've covered in a previous course.
2. Don't tell her that you did it in such-and-such course, and point out the teacher.
3. Don't point out that she's ignorant during the viva for said project.
4. Don't go to her chambers afterwards and point out once again, she was wrong, because she threatened to mark you badly.
5. If you've done all of the above, don't think that things will be okay. The Disciplinary Committee is waiting to get you.

Well, that's about it. It happened to me. Because I did it wrong. I'm grinning, but not for any reason connected to this.

Remember - honesty never got anyone anywhere. Especially not in Law School. Kiss teacher ass, and you'll be fine.

But if you want to do it wrong, this is how you do it. Be honest. Stand up for yourself, and your principles. Relish things that teach you, fight things that don't. Be lazy, but don't let it be an excuse. Be strong, and don't bow down to shit, however tempting that might be. If a teacher's bad, stand up to him/her. Let everyone know exactly how you feel. Put yourself out there and dare anyone to object. Don't give a damn about what people think, but give many damns about what you think about yourself. Improve, but in your own eyes - you are your best judge.

That's the meaning of honesty. And honesty is one of the many things you can do wrong in Law School.